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Your brain is like a sifter.

 

Your brain sifts through all the information in a nano second.


What’s good, what’s relevant, what’s not.


But there is one caveat to that.

 

It’s based on 3 things, your:

  1. Self-Concept:  Your filtered perception of who you think you are set by age 8. 
  2. Emotional capacity: Ability to feel all kinds of emotion. Let’s face it, as a child you were likely handed something to help you feel better vs. feel bad when something goes wrong. As an adult, you’ll easily look for this same way only it looks different than being handed a chance to go to the park when Patty flat-left you, or the school trip was canceled.  It was replaced with feeling happy right away, not pausing to allow you or know how to feel negative emotion — still with you when you are sitting down to do that tough project, for your business or work out a plan & gain clarity desired but has you overthinking more instead of taking action to find out — you’ll easily  avoid, escape, resist them as an adult.
  3. Self-Awareness level: When you don’t know how to see or manage mindset, and be able to pluck it out and see it with curiosity not judgment and your inner critic getting in the way or even to know if it’s serving you, often keeping you at arms length of where you wish to be.


Your brain looks through this lens of your preconceived self-concept based upon past and then tack on the lack of emotional capacity, your own limited awareness level to decipher what’s true, what’s not, 

 

All through approximately 75,000 thoughts you are having per day.

 

Whew, it’s trying it’s best to be efficient as possible, avoid pain and danger and seeking safety at the same time and getting the needed dopamine it thinks its needed to survive. 

 

Only guess what, you and I don’t live in cave man days. 


Your primitive part of your  brain has not evolved to where you are now.  This is the subconscious part of your brain on repeat automatically drives your behavior — where your beliefs are set even if you didn’t choose them purposely. 

 

Technology, SM, your life, the housing, the buildings, the cars, the food, and everything in it is growing and evolving exponentially everyday — only your brain is filtering through this preset lens of who you think you are set 40 years ago based upon your parents preconceived beliefs and so on and so on. 

 

It’s not evolving as fast and still has this set safety mechanism to guide you from literally dying — often just repeating generational messes from your parents, grandparents, and anything you picked up along the way. 

 

It learns through repetition and think and believe something enough, you take it on as a belief about yourself, that maybe you don’t feel good enough, matter or whatever — limiting your life today.


You’ll have a hard time following through to reach any goal especially in your second half and you are going after new things, new ambitions, maybe a new business or idea you had.


You’ll have to have the emotional capacity to feel negative emotion much bigger than your preset thermometer set at a low disappointment level when things get heavy in worrying about what someone thinks or if something is right or wrong. 


Your brain’s goal is safety and did I tell you it like to be right.  It doesn’t like change which is hard when you have something have new ideas that needs to be flushed out, that feels uncomfortable in your body. 

 

Here’s what often happens when we have big goals especially as women in the second half:

 

  • You’re following all the rules/habits learned as women passed down from passed generations and society norms —> you’ve left yourself last on the list for years doing for everyone else, people pleasing everyone else instead of yourself. 

 

  • You’re using things outside yourself to feel better (unknowingly), cleaning, chores, shopping, cocktails, IG perusing, latest Netflix series, or that big crazy world stressful crap happening going on at any given time — lets face it, bad things happen all the time but maybe it has you getting side tracked and doing nothing because it feels like whats the point when all this negative stuff is going on and I feel stupid pursuing this goal when there is much bigger things your brain thinks it should be worrying about, the list goes on – starting over every week because you are not following through. 

 

  • You know what you want, but can’t seem to get yourself to do it so you wind up stopping by Wednesday or working on things that aren’t even that important to creating the result you desire in your business.  You keep trying to make it perfect, don’t want to be wrong, not feeling good enough as such & such, thinking someone else has better answers or the answer so you start working on something else. Confused yet?


This happens more often if you’ve had a challenging childhood or some stressful events in your life that your body, although it’s a completely different situation, it doesn’t recognize the difference — this is where mind and body and body and mind are connected. The body remembers that stressful feeling and now when it shows up, it likes to escape and avoid instead of feel it or look at it with curiosity, not letting it get in the way.


Now that you’ve had a science lesson, h
ere’s truly what needs to change, if you want to start creating results you desire in your life especially taking action in your business or any area.


So before you start digging into changing direction, a new project, a new course, a new program — your brain finds comfort in doing those. Notice if you ever get to the hard part you abort mission!


I don’t want you to continue getting bamboozled by your own brain, it’s your friend not your foe but it’s based on old programming — making money, losing weight or some life change you desire to make in your life, needs a reset.

 

There are 3 caveats to help permanently change this around:

  1. Changing your beliefs about yourself. Rewiring your brain and resetting it to what you want to believe about yourself and your life based upon your future self not your past.
  2. Learn how to allow negative emotions to be in your body, instead of trying to not feel them or reacting to them, escaping and avoiding them all the time possibly without much awareness you are, not getting very far in your goals. 
  3. Raise your awareness to what the hec your mind is actually believing as true so you know what’s driving your behavior as you can’t change what you aren’t aware of.   


So when you find yourself stuck in doubt, overwhelm and confusion you can move through it, it doesn’t have to drive your behavior anymore keeping you stuck.
 These indulgent emotions keep you spinning at the door to success more times that you want and when you know what to do when they come, you’ll have tools and concepts to move through them. 


It’s a game changer and sustainable.  Real change. 

 

No more using food for comfort and gaining weight in the meantime when you can’t sit to figure your project out in your business no matter how you are feeling. 

 

No more going on FB when things feel overwhelming and confusing in your business or that great idea, and next thing you know Sally’s dog passed away and now you’re on Amazon looking for something to cheer her up (not saying to ignore your friend Sally, but this what our brains attach to — safety, pleasure and wants it now)


You can not change what you aren’t aware of is the cause of your problem or symptom.  

 

Raising your awareness so you can see what’s in the way because most of us can not see what is rolling around in our minds at any given time.  We have 75,000 thoughts a day!  


They are creating your personal reality in your life.

 

Your brain is the most powerful tool you have to change your life.

 

It’s possible to have everything you desire when you start to change your beliefs about yourself, increase your emotional capacity to feel and raising your awareness to your own thoughts and mindset.

 

You may think you know, but if you did you’d already achieved what you desired.

 

This is why the process I use helps really helps clients make sustainable change — we reset and rewire your brain.  We learn the process of feeling your emotions vs. escaping them when they arrive in your body or you feel triggered by what someone says or does.  And, you’ll learn what thoughts you are having that are causing a particular result — I promise we think we know but you’re human and you’ll believe your stories as true.

 

This is where  taking action becomes second nature, not a struggle having the same goals every week, month & year trying to make money in your business but can’t even seem to take action since you are always indulging in confusion and doubt and not feeling good enough.


Especially for us multipassionate women — having many talents might have you not choosing one.  Going all in a specific idea and you are trying to cover all the bases.  It’s like double-edged sword, you’ll constantly look to finding clarity & certainty you crave before you actually start but instead of taking action to find it, it keeps you stuck and sometimes trying to solve the  wrong problem.

 

You have everything inside you right now and I can help show you the way.

 

If you want to be successful in your business, health or life and start following through on your goals and ideas instead of constantly avoiding, let’s chat.  I can help you!


Please leave a comment on what you find difficult to follow through on in your life or business?

How many times have you changed your “mindset” about something only to find yourself right back in your old habits in days or weeks? Sort of like when your New Year Eve’s resolutions went out the window by the second week of February!

Habits are just that – habits!  They are not really connected to anything.  It’s something that we do subconsciously without even thinking about it.  Like brushing your teeth or getting dressed.

We actually have the power to change anything in a heartbeat as Tony Robbins would say.  I know that’s hard to believe when you’ve tried everything in order to quit smoking, stop drinking, quit junk food, change your eating habits, start exercising, save money or whatever it is that you want to change but keep resorting back to your old habits.

We associate change with being hard, don’t we.

As humans, we ultimately work from what is called the primal brain or the reptilian part of the brain.

Those are where your habits come from.

We think we just need to think our way through it or reframe your mindset (the prefrontal cortex part of our brain). It’s much deeper than that.  Habit’s come from the survival part of the brain or reptilian/primal part of your brain.

It’s where your beliefs are about yourself.

Your identity (who we are at an unconscious level).

So if you don’t think very highly of yourself for whatever reason at the core level/identity level (primal brain) it will be a constant conflict with your thinking part of your mind (prefrontal cortex).

You can’t be anything other than what you believe about yourself is.  Your thoughts and energy create your reality.

Your thinking part of the brain/prefrontal cortex is your “wants” part of your brain. Example:  I want to quit stop drinking – that’s your prefrontal cortex speaking. But the habits come from the reptilian part of the brain…the part that says you have to have a drink in order to survive.

Guess who wins?  The reptilian part!

The reptilian part believes that whatever habit we have is necessary for survival. Even if it’s not in our best interest or even what we want.

We tend to work from the outside in when we want change.  You get the healthy food, leave your running shoes where you can see them, join a gym, replace chewing gum with cigarettes, etc. Changing your environment or behavior only gets you so far for so long. You need to change from the inside out for lasting change.

We do what we are.

Now that I’ve explained a little how habits come from the primal brain and the prefrontal cortex is our thinking part. The part that wants us to change but primal brain always wins.

How do we actually make lasting change?

Especially if who we identify with is not who or what we want to be.

I’m going to use a client setting a goal to lose 25 lbs but doesn’t follow through to eating in a healthy manner.

In order to reach your ideal weight or whatever goal you have set (financial, health, business, whatever)…

Focus on what you want! Not on what you don’t want.  

Energy flows where your attention goes.

This is where we usually focus on what we can’t have and feel deprived – but we are focusing on the problem.

We need to see ourselves as the person that is 25 lbs lighter – all day, everyday.  We need to see ourselves as healthy and fit.

Seeing ourselves as what we want to become will help us to make the right choices.

This is more than visualization.  The brain learns from repetition and the reptilian brain does not know truth from a lie.

We need to write it down, look at it, hear it, feel it, emotionalize with seeing ourselves as the healthy fit person.  Look at ourself in the mirror and love what you see – even if you don’t believe it! Continue to tell yourself you do.

What does that feel like?

What do you see?

If negative self-talk comes in, just know it’s just a thought, take a few deep breaths in through your nose, hold it for a few seconds and out through your mouth and just be.  Love yourself.  The thought can be dismissed and replaced if you choose.  Let it go and replace it with a good thought.

Repetition and more repetition will slowly start to reprogram your brain.  Doing this over and over you start changing little by little, doing different things. You start to love the changes you are seeing.

You notice you are focusing more on the energy you want to create vs the energy you don’t because it feels better. Slowly it becomes a habit. Your reptilian brain realizes “hey she’s not taking the urge I’m giving her to go for the food you shouldn’t be eating” and slowly your new healthy option becomes the habit. You start to change the person at the identity subconscious level.

Habits can be changed and change doesn’t have to be hard.

You have to become (relentlessly) the person you want to become now.  In your thinking, not just your doing.  The doing will come naturally when you change your thoughts about who you believe yourself to be.

Start by declaring the change you want to see.  Write it down.  Look at it several times a day. Get immersed in it. Write as if it already IS.

Become who you want to be now as if it is true.  Ask yourself what would that person be thinking and doing.

Don’t use words like can’t choose words like don’t.  For example, I don’t eat chocolate cake rather than I can’t eat chocolate cake. It can make a world of difference when you are around friends and family.  And, you don’t have to say it to anyone but yourself.  No explanation is needed.

It’s not just about what you are eating, it’s about why you are eating it (without blame please).

Ask yourself “who was I being that created the person 25 lbs heavier than I am now”.  If self-worth is low on the list.  Start by writing “I am worthy.”

Remember one thing:  You have the power to change your beliefs no matter what they are!

Above all, the most important thing is to love and have confidence in yourself no matter where you are on your health journey every step of the way.

namaste.

While we sometimes do need a prescription for certain ailments or life threatening situations true health arises when we balance our mind, body and spirit.  We need to look to ourselves for the answers.

What Does a Balanced Healthy Life Really Look Like?

Getting there doesn’t happen overnight and it’s not really a destination!  Good health nourishes you from inside out.  Starting with the how we talk to ourselves – self love. Our bodies are meant to work like a well-oiled machine and in perfect harmony.  It’s truly miraculous!  When given the right ingredients your body can heal itself but you need to be aware of what’s going on and do not ignore the symptoms it gives you.  A healthy balanced life doesn’t have debilitating side effects like some prescriptions do especially if taken long term for a chronic issue.  Especially most of them weren’t even designed to be taken that long (ie. acid reflux medicine!!).

It probably doesn’t look like the super-model on the cover of Vogue either!  Get comfortable in your own skin!

Balance isn’t Perfect Everyday!

Balance isn’t perfect everyday but a practice over time to what feels good for you. Listen to your body and look to your higher self for the answers, it knows intuitively what it needs as well as has all the answers it needs. Symptoms pop up to tell us “hey, something is off, come look a bit deeper to finding the root cause”.  Try to get out of the habit for looking for the quick fix or pop a pill to put a band-aid approach to a bigger issue.  Question your health care professional, seek a second opinion, don’t believe everything you read, what is good for one might be poison to another.

Stress can Wreak Havoc on Our Bodies

Stress is also a huge factor in our lives today especially with all the technology that is literally coming at us every minute of the day.

Stress comes in many levels. For example, your body can be stressed internally from a simple sugar overload which is difficult for you organs and blood to process.  Or you may be eating a food that you don’t even realize you are sensitive too which is causing digestive distress.  Top that with stress from business or job, financial pressures, family, relationships, etc.  You could be eating all the super-foods in the world and if you have a lot of stress in your life you can kiss your health good-bye.  On the flip-side, some small level of stress, helps keep us motivated and strive for something better so that’s where balance is key.  Do what feels good and practice what keeps you peaceful!

12 Steps to balance your life for better health:

  1. Take 6-8 deep belly breaths, breathe in through your nose while your belly expands (not your chest) and hold for 5 then out through your mouth slowly for 6-8 when you first wake up or anytime you want to recenter yourself.  This helps trigger your parasympathetic nervous system and awaken more happiness, peace as well as productiveness in your life!
  2. Get a morning daily ritual that includes some self-care.  Meditation, reading, journaling are all great to include.  Time to reflect and appreciate the day that is coming.  Also a gratitude journal is also a great way to start your day.  Gratitude truly can be a game changer!
  3. Just eat whole foods (forget food with labels and boxes, fast food and it would be a good idea to try to eat home as much as you can).  Restaurants are known for using bad oils and unhealthy ingredients.  However if the restaurant you frequent is using healthy ingredients and preparation  than go for it!  And, please share in the comments who they are!  Even Whole Foods is using canola oil in preparation of their already prepared food station — canola oil is not a healthy oil!
  4. Drink more water!  When you urinate your urine should be light not yellow and dark (although if you are taking supplements they do cause yellow urine).
  5. Exercise!  Find what works for you but get moving to create oxygen and move stagnant energy that might be stuck in your body!! It doesn’t have to be hard core as a matter of fact over exercising is not good either!  Walking or stretching is great way to start!
  6. Body Tapping! Your body is energy! If you’ve been sitting for a long time or when you first wake up you want to wake up your organs and get the blood and energy moving and release stagnant energy in your body.  This helps to release toxins as well.  First rub your hands together in quick motion creating energy or even clapping is great.  Start with your ankles and move all the way up the back of your legs, arms (each one), neck/sternum, chest, back and kidney area.  The whole idea is to move the energy in your meridian lines in your body and helps balance your chakras (your energetic/emotional body).
  7. Eat more vegetables! I don’t subscribe to one style of eating but everyone, everyone could benefit from eating more vegetables!  They are nutrient dense and help with so many ailments.  Please note eating cold salads everyday doesn’t necessarily mean that they are good for you if they cause bloat and gas.  This typically means that you may not be digesting them and cooking them would be ideal for you.
  8. Sleep! You should shoot for 7-9 hours of sleep a night.  For some that might seem like a dream but if you are not sleeping, your health will deteriorate in some form or another.  You need to restore and rejuvenate, to grow muscle, repair tissue, and synthesize hormones.  It all happens when we sleep.
  9. Dump the chemicals you are using in your home, on your skin and in your food!  Nowadays it is easy to find natural products in regular stores as well as online.  Chemicals disrupt hormones, cause cancer, breathing/lung issues, asthma, brain fog, ADD, ADHD, contributing to you not losing the weight you want to lose, inflammation, organs not working optimally…just to name a few!
  10. Prepare and plan!  Food, schedules, life needs to organized not wake up and figure it out in a scattered mindless way. You set your day up for failure that way.  Focus and allow yourself enough time to plan your week and day.  Everyone has a different system but find one that works for you.  If you are running late all the time for appointments, going through the drive through or just plain exhausted you need a better plan!  We all get 24 hours in a day – it is a choice on how we choose to use it ~ no excuses!
  11. Eat mindfully.  Sit down and really enjoy your food and praise it.  Take time to really appreciate it.  You might think this is something you can skip but digestion starts the minute you look at your food.  Digestive enzymes are start to churn in your mouth the minute you look at your plate!  Take time to chew your food that is half the battle of helping it to digest!
  12. Feed your mind with good thoughts!  Your beliefs DO rule your life.  It’s good practice to continue to feed your mind with positive thoughts several times a day if you tend to have negative self talk.  Just be aware of the thought and then send it on it’s way then replace it with something positive even if it’s not really true.  Believe first, then see!!! Not see and believe!

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